As the propaganda ramps up after a slew of nationalist junk opinion polls, here’s one you could trust

by Colin Campbell

INVERNESS news and views will be breaking new ground when we commission a new opinion poll on the mood of the nation at this critical time on the independence issue.

It will be commissioned by INV, carried out by INV, and its findings will fit in with the agenda of INV.

We have decided to do this after a slew of opinion polls have appeared in rapid succession indicating soaring support for independence and stratospheric levels of adulation for Nicola Sturgeon’s handling of the virus. Believe all this if you will.

Some of these are closely connected to two pro-independence “organisations”, something grandly titled Businesses for Scotland, run by Gordon MacIntyre Kemp, and something equally grandly titled Progress Scotland, run by Angus Robertson.

Recent dodgy, doubtful, dubious polls have been reported in sections of the media without mention of any pro-independence leanings they may have. And there’s a clear intention behind all this – namely to keep a bandwagon view rolling that independence is now inevitable and Boris Johnson’s opposition to another independence referendum is “unsustainable”.

Our completely objective and unbiased poll will pose four scientifically weighted questions:

A/ Do you wish to remain British; or B/ Do you wish to remain in the United Kingdom; or C/ Undecided.

How best would you describe Nicola Sturgeon’s coronavirus response. A/ Absolutely chopping and changingly b****y awful; B/ Cynical exploitation to promote the independence cause; C/A combination of both; or D/Undecided.

Which description do you think best fits the SNP leader at Westminster, Ian Blackford. A/ A simple 10-acres crofter; B/A rank political hypocrite; C/A cynical money-grubbing chancer who raked in £242,000 in expenses from a Westminster institution he claims he wants to destroy; or D/ Undecided.

What gives you most concern about the SNP plan for independence. A/ No information on what currency we would use. B/ No information on passport control arrangements at the border with England. C/No information on how and when an independent Scotland could rejoin the EU. D/No information on how an independent Scotland would compensate for the extra £15 billion it gets in public spending each year compared with England from being part of the UK. E/A combination of all four leading to our country becoming an impoverished basket case run by power drunk zealots who’d already have made sure they’d taken care of themselves with plenty expenses and big salary cash stored (just to be safe) in the Cayman Islands. Or F (Undecided).

We will publish our findings in due course.

Mr MacIntyre Kemp, a former columnist on the vile National, runs Business Scotland from a whelk stall he owns on the seafront at Troon.

Mr Robertson, a former SNP MP and a current columnist in the vile National, runs Progress Scotland from his garden shed.

 

 

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